One night as I lay in bed,

When the room was quiet but my mind was not

A jarring reality hit me

I’m getting older

Feeling distance tear away at the friendships

That I left back home 

Worried that when we meet again

Recognition will leave our eyes

I’m getting older

Remembering the hopes I had for my future,

Now I’m mourning the person I thought I’d be 

Fighting a mind that wants to see me fail 

In a battle that’s getting harder to win

I’m getting older 

Missing when people were proud of me,

Because I couldn’t do it for myself

Now that validation’s gone

Only leaving the ache of mediocrity 

I’m getting older

But not growing up, despite 20 creeping closer 

I still feel stuck three or four years in the past

When my life hadn’t succumbed to the unknown

And the fear of aging wasn’t a crushing weight

I’m getting older

And as the time grows nearer 

for me to celebrate another year around the sun,

It’s frightening to think that getting older 

Has just begun