A tailgate to remember

Officials say FreshéMann, the 19-year-old student who disappeared on Saturday during UTSA’s football game, was found safe a mile away from the stadium.

Following the game, Mann’s fraternity brothers reported him after they discovered his plastic flask and a vomit-stained shoe near where he had been sitting during the game.

“When I asked him where he was, he kept saying that he couldn’t make it to the game,” said fraternity brother Craig Stand who had attempted to call the missing Mann. “The game had already been over for an hour.”

Earlier that evening Mann had been seen drinking heavily during a tailgate party as well as enjoying a hotdog with mustard. The hotdog, which had been cooked over a grill, was never recovered.

Stadium witnesses report that Mann spent the majority of the game slumped over in his seat, yelling “UT” — to no audible “SA.” After ruining his whitewash jeans and boots, the freshman went to use the bathroom.

“He was sitting in the garbage can as I exited the bathroom,” said a female witness. “He popped out, yelling ‘Get Rowdy!’ and asked for my number.”

Mann was found approximately 12 hours later. He appears unscathed with only minor issues of memory loss sustained in a construction lot port-a-potty.