I have no clue

Illustration by Alex Hanks

Illustration by Alex Hanks


It takes heart to know what your soul desperately needs

And it took me a lifetime to find out what my soul wanted to be. 

If I was a stronger person I wouldn’t have listened to you

I would have stuck to myself and believed it to be true. 


We would fight for so long it was easier to quickly let it go 

Even though the lies you whispered hurt more than you could ever know. 

Do you remember when I wanted you to stay?

And I whispered ‘I love you’ like it could make your words go away. 


There was never a time when I was sad to watch you go, 

But I would rather leave than hurt the sweet person I used to know. 

Every word, every gesture, every breath

Reminded me of the person I was before you.


I like to think I loved you, 

But I am starting to wonder if I did at all

Not because I hated you, but because I wonder 

If it was love, if all we did was hope the other would fall. 


I looked into your eyes and couldn’t see

What I truly had the potential to be

Because it seemed you took all my power

And called it love instead.