Prom was a disaster. Despite my unexpected crowning as prom king, I couldn’t shake my feeling of emptiness. It was supposed to be a moment of celebration, but instead, it felt like a reminder of what I had lost. Watching Lola dance with her friends all night only emphasized the growing chasm between us. I had the painful realization that she was slipping further away from me by the second. I thought I could get her back, but it wasn’t looking too good anymore.
I knew I screwed up; what I did with Valerie was a mistake. It was a moment of weakness, and it cost me the person who had brought all the light and happiness into my life. I had to find a way to make amends; I had to prove that I truly wanted to make things right with Lola. After prom, I poured my feelings onto a page in a letter to Lola. It was all about my regret and desire to make things right. I’d acknowledged my mistake with Val and promised to do everything in my power to earn back Lola’s trust.
I drove to her house, letter in hand. As I walked up the stairs to her porch, I could barely breathe; my nerves were through the roof. I hesitated for a moment, wondering if this would even make any difference. I slipped the letter under her front door, taking a step back, hoping she would read it. I knew this wasn’t enough to fix things, but it was a start.
I continued to give Lola the space she needed to figure things out; I didn’t call or message. I tried to focus on improving myself, but it was hard. I’d reflected on my mistakes and promised myself I’d try to be a better person. If not for my own sake, for Lola’s. I hoped my time and efforts would lead to a chance to make things right with her.
As graduation day approached, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of urgency. I wanted to see Lola one last time before we all parted ways. I wanted to let her know that I had changed and that I still cared for her. I’d hoped that it wasn’t too late, but I had to at least try.
Graduation day arrived, and as I sat in my cap and gown, I couldn’t help but feel a sense of relief and excitement, but I was also nervous. The end of high school meant the beginning of a new chapter in my life, but I wasn’t sure I was ready to leave the past behind. I couldn’t help but wonder what Lola was feeling after she read my letter.
As the names of the graduates were called, I watched Lola cross the stage. I knew she was relieved to be able to move on with her life. I could only hope I was included in that, but I couldn’t be sure yet. I approached her after the ceremony, flowers in hand and my heart pounding in my chest. I looked into her eyes, hoping to find a glimmer of forgiveness. Instead, Lola’s response hit me like a ton of bricks.
“Connor,” Lola began, her voice tinged with finality. “I didn’t read your letter. I’ve made my decision, and it’s time for me to move forward.”
The words stung, and disappointment washed over me. She made it clear that my attempts to make things right had fallen on deaf ears. Lola had chosen to leave the past behind and pursue her dreams, and I had no place in those plans. As we parted ways, the weight of her decision hung heavily in the air. It was a painful reminder of the consequences of my actions, and I knew that it was time for both of us to chart our own separate paths.
